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I Lost Myself Again.

by Forever Losing Sleep

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1.
I remember feeling young But broken just how you intended A Perfect image gone bad I never had a chance to break away from feeling fragile I thought that I wasn't scared to be alone But I was wrong, I'm always wrong You should have let me die that night on the couch And you should have let me rot in a stomach But instead you gave me hope Just so you could take it all away Where were you that night That a daughter lost her innocence against her will Because I expected you to show your face But you never came and you never will Is this what you had planned all along Because I'd probably be a better man if I had stayed away But now I know better than to believe in something I can't see You should have let me die that night on the couch And you should have let me rot in a stomach But instead you gave me hope Just so you could take it all away
2.
Twitch 05:36
I know I've been vacant afraid to feel a thing Afraid if I do it will leave me again These sunken in eyes no longer see the good in anything anymore What have I become I used to believe in something more I used to feel the need to love What have I become Now I look for you in everything I see And I'm still searching for the warmth I used to feel inside of me I couldn't save you I couldn't bare to take the news How could I walk away When you were all I ever knew If your heavens real I hope that you are looking down at me Knowing I spent mine with you And I have tried to fight the urge to join you But I still feel the void I still feel the ache I'm still incomplete I want to feel the need to love I want to turn it all around I want to find myself And I need you to know that I'm learning to accept the things that I can't change I lost myself again And I found myself wishing for the things I never said I never meant to leave you behind
3.
Trophied 03:58
A failure, I was born in your eyes Your greatest mistake And I am what's wrong with everything And I am what's wrong with me I am nothing, I am no one, I am yours I'll just pretend that I can be fixed Because somethings are meant to be broken And I am one of them A silhouette of what was never meant So stay away it would be best to keep your distance I have come to terms that there is nothing more than this And every empty word I sent your way was meaningless
4.
Widows 03:32
This isn't what I wanted I didn't ask for this We didn't ask for this But I guess that's life Nothing ever goes our way And I'm starting to learn that nothing good ever seems to last I haven't seen those blue eyes shine in a long time In a long time So I stood back and watched you fall apart on the inside I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I let you down I let you down when you needed me the most I should have known that pushing you away Wouldn't heal these broken bones
5.
I heard you scream from the other side of the house I still can feel you shaking in my thoughts And now you're broken But I am broken too I miss the days when we were young and you would shine I know that I have tried to be a better man There is nothing pure running through these veins anymore There in nothing pure running through these veins anymore Who am I I thought the thoughts in my head would clarify All the reasons why I can't always say the things I need to say to you So I ran away just like I always do I remember the day that I gave up I lost myself, I lost myself again Because I've lived and died watching the wither in your eyes In your eyes And I don't think I've ever loved anything more Than the thought of growing old and loved But the thought of waking up with nothing left and everything you know and love is gone It scares me to think that I am young And I've had to watch you break So I learned how to ache like it was the only thing that I would ever know Now all that I have left is this lump in my throat and the bags under my eyes And now I know what giving up really feels like There is nothing pure running through these veins anymore
6.
I asked to be left alone Well I got what I asked for and more And the worst part is I wouldn't have it any other way There's no saving me anymore You taught me how to love again But made sure I'd remember why I always kept my distance I thought that you would save me But you couldn't stay And now I'm on my own And now I'm on my own, and every day feels empty without you And now I know I'm nothing without you (I tried my best to find content but I'm drowning in the words I never said) I'm screaming I wish you the best from this God damn hole So where will you go now that you're alone Where will you go? Because I did this to myself a hundred times before Now I don't want to feel anything anymore And maybe it's all my fault that everything I love always falls apart Maybe I deserve this Maybe I deserve this
7.
Take 04:45
Take, take what you want Take what you need from me because I have nothing left to give Take, just take it all away Because I don't want to feel responsible for something I can't control What's the point in waking up When there is nothing left that I love and nothing is enough So take what you want from me because I have nothing left to give I swear to you I'm giving in I've got a lack of will to live And who's to blame Because lately I've been feeling like it's been misplaced So who's to blame Because I've been spending all my days looking for an exit An escape to all of this I'm tired, and I'm worn out I've lost all the faith that I have in myself This is the last time I'll pick myself up off the floor I am shaking, I am shaking I have never felt this cold Now I'm standing on my feet But I have glass between my knees and they will shatter with the wind that blows from every empty word you speak So I will fall apart and these wounds will never mend Because even time can't heal the emptiness I feel inside my chest And today I felt something die inside of me But I'm still here and I'm still breathing
8.
Miracle 02:59
I used to feel so young I used to feel like someone who was capable of love Before knowing better And I still hear you in the other room letting it all out What was I to do Wishing to hold you up but being too weak I was just a child falling short of who my father would have wanted me to be It was over before it all began I ran away from you, I ran away I wasn't strong enough to carry you So I learned to ache enough for the both of us The both of us

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released October 14, 2014

Recorded / Produced / Mixed by Steve Aliperta, Chris LaRocque, and Peter DeBarros at Kennedy Studios in North Billerica, MA

Mastered by Jackie Smiley at The Lodge in New York, NY

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Forever Losing Sleep New Jersey

Band from New Jersey

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